Dreading Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is next week. Are you dreading seeing friends’ social media posts of bouquets and chocolates, knowing that your husband probably won’t offer such sweet gestures? More than candies and flowers, this holiday can deliver expectations (and disappointment) we have of our significant others.

Here’s an idea … let’s take the pressure off and plan our own celebration. Jesus said to do good for others without expecting to get anything back, and He tells us in John 13:34, “As I have loved you, so you must love one another.” What does this kind of love look like? Well, it is a sacrifice of self, which includes our expectations. This can be hard as it’s opposite of how our natural mind (and desires) works.

This kind of love involves effort, not merely emotion. It requires action, not just feeling. Such love comes from God and leads us to being content: “God­liness with contentment is great gain” (1 Timothy 6:6). Contentment is not based on circum­stances, but on the person of Christ. Because we possess all the treasures found in Him, we have all we need. When we learn this type of contentment, it’ll guide our expectations and works.

So let’s put this love into action! Think of something you and your husband both enjoyed in the past and then try to recreate it. It doesn’t have to be dinner and roses. It can be tennis, watching a movie, cooking, whatever. We can keep sweet memories alive ourselves without depending on our husband to come up with a plan. Then, Valentine’s Day, anniversaries, and date nights will be filled with joyful anticipation and without disappointing expectations.

Lord, I acknowledge my expectations and ask for Your forgiveness for resenting my reality. Instead of idly waiting for my desires to materialize, help me proactively make plans that bless my marriage. Amen.

Order our Valentine’s Day Special, 20% off ($21.73) now through February 14 only:

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  • A Couple After God’s Own Heart
  • 15 Verses to Pray for Your Husband
  • Encouraging Words for a Woman After God’s Own Heart
  • PLUS a FREE 15-page devotional PDF (How to be a Closer Couple) and a beautiful Love Never Fails screensaver!

“And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:19)

I’ll decide now that it is okay to celebrate Valentine’s Day or our anniversary on another date, when it’s most convenient for everyone’s schedule. It’s not the date that’s important; it’s the celebration of another year of marriage and love that’s important.


“O, Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be loved as to love.” ~St. Assisi

Read Dreading Valentine’s Day on Elizabeth & Jim George.

Jim and Elizabeth George

Jim and Elizabeth George are bestselling authors and national speakers dedicated to helping people live a life after God’s own heart. Together, they have written over 150 books with more than 14 million copies sold around the world. For over 35 years, the teachings and steadfast example of Elizabeth and Jim have helped countless men and women:

  • Simplify life by focusing on God’s priorities.
  • Appreciate God’s Word and apply it to everyday situations.
  • Respond to circumstances with confidence by seeing yourself through God’s loving eyes.
  • Increase closeness in marriage by serving and honoring each other.
  • Powerfully shape the hearts of children and teenagers.
  • Enjoy greater intimacy with God.

Learn more about Jim and Elizabeth George here.

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